Back to School and Cutting Back on Screen Time

If your back-to-school plans include a shake-up of routines and a reset, you are definitely not alone.

A theme in our end-of-summer parent sideline chatter has been the much-anticipated reduction in screen time that comes with school and a new routine. For years, our kids watched cartoons on weekend mornings while we parents got ready for the day or prepped for adventures. Maybe there were a few hours on a rare afternoon when we needed to get some work done. And then COVID happened, and like most families, our screen boundaries got looser and looser.

This summer, we decided to make a major reset and cut nearly all screen time. After a rough adjustment period, we found ourselves parenting a whole new crew of kids. They started teaching each other new games, creating art, heading outside, enjoying family walks together, and finding all sorts of ways to entertain themselves that didn’t involve a screen.

But let’s be real: it’s hard. Really hard. Setting limits is one thing. Sticking to them is another.

So if you’re heading into the school year hoping to dial back screen time, here are five strategies to help your family make the transition without making it feel like a dreaded punishment for everyone involved.

These are practical, realistic ways to limit screen time for kids while creating routines that actually feel sustainable—and setting your whole family up for a smoother school year.

1- Establish family limits

Start by setting clear, reasonable screen-time limits that work for your family. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach—what works for one family may not work for another.

If you’re met with resistance, set a time to revisit the new limits together. Talk about what’s working, what isn’t, and what might need to change. Kids are often more willing to accept new boundaries when they have a real voice in the process.

Once you’ve agreed on your family’s limits, make them visible. Post them on the fridge, near the family “drop zone,” or wherever you keep other important reminders. And remember: screen-time boundaries don’t have to be permanent. As your children grow and your family’s routines change, revisit them and adjust as needed.

2- Identify a list of fun and active alternatives 

Create a list of activities your family can turn to instead of reaching for the remote, iPad, or phone. Keep a mix of indoor and outdoor activities, active and quiet options, and things kids can do independently as well as together.

Think of this as your family’s “What can we do instead?” list. Add to it regularly and keep it somewhere easy to see—a poster in the playroom, a list on the fridge, or a jar of activity ideas can all work. On those tricky “I’m bored!” days, you’ll have ideas ready to go instead of having to come up with something on the spot.

Family activities might include a walk, bike ride, hike, trip to the playground, or another outdoor adventure. Indoors, try drawing, crafts, board games, cards, building with magnetic blocks, reading, or setting up an invitation to play.

The goal isn’t to fill every minute of the day. It’s simply to make sure your family has plenty of appealing alternatives when a screen would otherwise become the default.

3- Avoid reward and punishment around screen time

Let’s be honest: taking away the iPad can be an incredibly effective way to get a quick change in behavior. And you’ve probably heard the advice to make screen time a reward for good behavior—or take it away when kids misbehave.

The problem is that when screen time becomes our most powerful reward or punishment, we can unintentionally send the message that screens are the most valuable thing in the house. Instead of helping kids develop a healthy relationship with technology, we may be making the iPad feel even more desirable.

That doesn’t mean screen time has to be completely off-limits, or that you can never change a child’s access to it. It simply means thinking beyond the immediate behavior you’re trying to correct and considering the bigger picture.

This is a long game. There’s no quick-and-dirty trick that will transform your family’s relationship with screens overnight. The goal is to gradually make screens one part of family life—not the prize at the center of it.

4- Lead by example with screen time use

It’s hard to convince kids that cutting back on screen time matters if the adults in their lives are constantly checking their own phones. Kids notice what we do far more than what we say.

Take a look at your own screen habits, too. Create some separation between work, social media, and family time, and establish your own boundaries around when and where you use your phone.

One simple place to start is a “phone zone.” Choose a spot where everyone—including adults—can leave their phones during family meals, outings, games, or other screen-free time. When the grown-ups put their phones away, it makes the expectation feel less like a rule for kids and more like a family habit.

You don’t have to model perfect screen habits. You just have to be willing to practice what you’re asking your kids to practice.

5- Recruit your community

A quick conversation with the parents of your children’s friends will probably reveal something important: you’re not the only one trying to figure this out.

This isn’t about grandstanding, comparing families, or shaming anyone for how much screen time their kids get. Every family is different. An only child may have a very different routine than a child with three siblings. A single parent may have different demands than a two-parent household. Work schedules, childcare, personalities, ages, and a hundred other factors can all shape what screen time looks like at home.

So skip the comparison game and think of it as a “more hang time, less screen time” effort. Talk with other parents about creating more opportunities for kids to simply be together. Set up a playdate, invite a family along for a hike, meet at the playground, or plan a backyard afternoon.

The goal isn’t to create a perfect screen-free childhood. It’s to make real-life connections easier and give your kids a few more stories to tell their friends at school on Monday.

And then… Revisit and Recalibrate

After a few days, weeks, and months, revisit your family’s screen-time habits. Together, talk about what’s working and what might need to be tweaked. Maybe that means easing up and allowing a little more screen time. Maybe it means scaling back even further. There is no perfect balance that works for every family, or even for the same family in every season.

We really are all doing our best. Sometimes we’re thriving, sometimes we’re barely keeping everyone fed and dressed, and sometimes the screen is exactly what gets us through the afternoon. This is not a competition.

Land on what feels sustainable and works best for your family in this chapter of parenting. The goal of reducing screen time isn’t to achieve some magical number of minutes. It’s to create more opportunities for health, connection, movement, creativity, and time together.

Hiccups are inevitable. If you need to slow down, adjust your expectations, or start over, do it. There’s no prize for getting there fastest.

Have an amazing start to the new school year!

And if you need more support, advice, commiseration, or really anything at all, drop me an email at hello at marleyandmoose dot com. I’m always happy to hear from you.